


Remember

by dragontooth52



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: And before Percy goes missing, Nico is lonely, Nico is sad, Nico loves Percy, No one really cares about him, after the titan war, one-sided percy/nico - Freeform, sort of just before Nico leaves camp?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 03:59:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8563033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragontooth52/pseuds/dragontooth52
Summary: After the Titan war, but before Percy goes missing, Nico is still at camp Half-Blood. But he isn't very happy. After all, watching everyone around you laugh and smile and be happy is hard, especially when everyone hates you. And a certain son of Poseidon isn't making things any better.Just some more short depressing stuff because I'm not good at writing about anything else apparently.Also, if you are suffering from depression or anything like it, please seek help because you are a wonderful individual and deserve better.





	1. I Can Remember A Time When I Used To Care For You

Snow fell softly against the ground, covering it with a fluffy white layer of powder. My bare feet were half covered by the cold snowflakes, and I was shivering from the cold, despite the thick aviator jacket I was wearing. From my place at the front steps of my cabin, I could see campers running through the snowdrifts.

I could make out the Stoll brothers having a snowball fight with some children of Nike and Ares. Smaller kids were making snowmen or snow angels, and half the Athena cabin had banded together to make a huge castle out of the snow. Up on Half-Blood hill, Thalia’s tree had been decorated with fluffy tinsel and shining baubles. The dragon that guarded the Golden Fleece, Pelias, was curled around the trunk, sleeping. His heat radiated a ring of warmth out from the tree and melted the snow.

At the canoe lake, I could see campers ice skating, either sliding gracefully across the snow like they were flying, or skidding awkwardly, tumbling and skimming their knees or elbows. I turned my gaze away from all the campers, and all the Christmas celebration. It wasn’t what I was looking for, and it wasn’t helping the cold that surrounded me – inside and out.

My breath caught in my throat as another blast of cold wind cut through me, so strong it had me tensing my legs and clenching my teeth in an effort not to shake from the cold. What was wrong with me? I had spent nights on the street when it had been much colder, and I had been alone, without my jacket, with the possibility of being attacked and hurt, maybe even killed, at any time. I shook my head, a few flakes of snow falling from my hair as I realised the answer.

I had grown used to the luxury of Camp Half-Blood. Despite the fact no one cared about me. Despite the fact I had promised myself not to stay. Despite what I knew in my heart – that my very existence made me hated. Despite everything, I had gotten used to the warmth and comfort of the demigod camp.

But why? Why had I allowed myself to stay when I wasn’t wanted? Why had I allowed myself to believe, to be delusional enough, to trick myself into thinking that I could fit in. I kicked my feet, freeing them from the biting cold snow that they had been half-buried under.

“Why do I do this to myself?” I muttered angrily. I had been falling into this unpleasant train of thought more and more often, the longer I stayed at camp. The longer I stayed with all these people who were all happy, all smiling, all ignoring me and judging me and hating me.

I turned to go back into my cabin. To do what, I wasn’t sure. Maybe to get some shoes, or just to avoid the campers. Or maybe just to avoid one particular camper. Who was also the reason I was in this mess, I realised.

I took one step back towards my cabin’s door before a voice yelled out, calling my name. I froze in place and turned, to see who had called my name, although I knew it would only be one person. And I watched in disappointment as that one person ran through the snow, waving at me and yelling. “Hey, Nico!”

I winced, but managed not to turn and run at the sound of Percy Jackson’s voice.


	2. But I Can't Remember A Time When You Actually Cared About Me

I waited until Percy was standing right in front of me, grinning and huffing breaths of air that formed steam in the cold air, before returning his greeting. “Hi Percy.”

Why? Why do I do this to myself? For a moment, I glanced up at Percy’s brilliant sea-green eyes. Then, before he could read my expression, I looked away, wiping my face blank.

“How’re you going?” He asked, grinning.

“Fine.” I said stiffly. But he asked. He asked how I was! Maybe he does care.

“I was wondering if you wanted to come down to the canoe lake with us.” Percy suggested.

I looked past the son of Poseidon, back to the canoe lake, and at all the laughing, happy campers. That would change if I was there. They would cast me cruel glances and whisper. I looked back at Percy, noticing his green Christmas sweater. I wasn't sure why, but that just made me feel even worse.

“No.” I said finally.

“Aw, c’mon man.” Percy protested. “It’ll be fun. And you aren’t doing anything better.”

I wasn’t. But I didn’t want to go to the canoe lake with Percy. I didn’t want to go anywhere with Percy. So I shook my head. “No thanks.”

“If you’re sure.” Percy shrugged. I let a breath of air escape my teeth and cloud around my face, before evaporating. Was it really that easy to shake other people off? I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed.

“Aren’t you cold?” Percy asked after a few moments of silence. I looked down at my bare feet. Were they blue? Did they looked a blue? Maybe a little. It was probably a bad sign. I should get some shoes. Maybe I should just say yes to Percy. He may get me some shoes that weren’t so worn out they had holes in them. But instead I half shrugged my shoulders and shook my head.

“You sure? I can get you some shoes or something if you want.” Percy asked.

“I’m fine, Percy.” I said.

“Alright.” Percy shrugged.

Just like the last time, it had only taken a couple of tries to shake him off. It was a bad sign, wasn’t it? What would Bianca have done? She would have gotten me warm socks, a thicker jacket, shoes, and taken me down to the canoe lake. She definitely wouldn’t have taken ‘no’ for an answer if I was the way I was now.

Why?

Because she cared about me.

I looked back at Percy, who was still standing there, probably trying to think of something else to say. He opened his mouth, but before he could speak, another voice yelled out. We both followed the source of the sound, and I saw Annabeth’s blonde hair, and the glint of her grey eyes. She was waving at Percy and yelling his name.

He glanced at me apologetically. “Sorry, Nico, but I gotta go see what Annabeth wants. I’ll be right back.”

“Yeah.” I said, trying not to sound bitter. “Wouldn’t want to keep your girlfriend waiting.”

Percy hesitated for a moment, and I thought I saw a glimmer of confusion flit across his face, but I must have been mistaken, because he grinned, bid me goodbye, and jogged off towards his girlfriend.

I sat down on the steps of the Hades Cabin and watched the rest of camp laugh and play in the snow. I watched Percy’s windblown black hair move further and further away, until I lost interest. I sighed, and stood up again. It was clear Percy wasn’t going to come back. It was clear he didn’t care enough to.

I swore I would always care enough to help him when he needed it, and to follow through with that promise, no matter what.

But part of me wondered if he would ever care enough about me to return the favour.


End file.
